garrulously | Where Ivan truly achieves his life goals

The movement snaps Ivan from his mind, and he's alert when David pulls back, arching one brow and waiting for him to speak. And when he does, Ivan just smiles at him, wide and handsome. "Yes you may," he answers, managing to keep most of his glee out his voice. He shifts them slightly, pulling David more into his lap for an easier time of it. But he does nothing else, just waits.

Sitting sideways in Ivan's lap isn't quite how David imagined this going, but he's certainly not arguing as Ivan shifts his position. One hand settles hesitantly on Ivan's shoulder and after a noticeable pause, his other reaches to take one of the man's hands. If he's going to get used to this, he should dive in. Never mind that his heart is actually skipping a beat at their close proximity.

His approach is cautious as he leans in to kiss Ivan, eager, but chaste.

Edited 2016-06-15 21:47 (UTC)

He threads his fingers through Duv's hand automatically, giving it a warm encouraging squeeze as he lets Duv set the pace of the kiss. Ivan's not the one showing, after all, although he could if David wanted it. Instead he's letting the other man lead, his free hand sliding into the hair at the nape of his neck.

None of this stops him from being completely thrilled with this turn of events, however. He's warm in his lap, eager in a way Ivan finds completely endearing. This could be a problem, Ivan's back brain supplies, while most of Ivan promptly ignores it.

He can do this. The way Ivan's responding gives David confidence and he feels secure pressed up against the other man. His hand clutches Ivan's shoulder more tightly as a small sound of want escapes his lips before he presses his lips back against his.

Perhaps he should have more shame, but this is the same man that helped give him a handjob only a few weeks prior. If anything, he feels safer doing this with Ivan than flinging himself at the whim of Beta Colony.

Well. Ivan attempts to ignore the first instinctual response to that sound and tries for the more professional. His hands come up to cup David's face -- thumbs smoothing along the lines of his cheek, fingers brushing the edges of his jaw -- and parts his lips, deepening the kiss.

He's careful not to hold the other man tightly, to not press for too much, but for encouragement, reassurance. David's doing fine, and Ivan wants to make sure he knows that.

Is he--? Yes, yes he is and there's a moment where David almost shys away. But Ivan's touch is reassuring. After a second of hesitation, he follows the man's lead, as clumsy as he is at it. When he leaves here, David isn't going to have trouble with his homework though the need feels more pressing in the moment.

He's pressed firmly against the other man's chest as a strained moan slips past his lips. Good god, does he really sound like that right now? He pulls back, embarrassed, and offers a quiet, "Ah, sorry. I think we might need to stop."

Ah. Right, yes. Ivan lets him pull away, and nods in order to convey his understanding of David's boundaries. "Alright. Would you like to go back to cuddling?" He asks, and tries not to look disappointed. Because he's not. Even if he really, really wants to hear the other man make that sound again.

It's less boundaries and more David is concerned he may end up requesting something more than he should. He hesitates at the question before nodding. "Is it all right if I stay here?" In Ivan's lap, where he can rest more fully against the other man's chest.

Maybe it was a good thing he changed his earrings out. On Beta Colony he could at least try to experience a real relationship instead of relying on his LSP.

Ivan's an LSPT, David, there's no limit to 'more than you should' unless it's 'this is what makes me uncomfortable'. Ah, Beta Colony. Ivan runs a hand through David's hair, resettling on his shoulder to encourage him to keep himself close. "It is, yes." He's not too heavy, and Ivan takes good physical care of himself -- he knows he's good looking, but it never hurts to put in a little more effort.

"Has what you wanted out of this changed at all? With this revelation and decision -- I know your original goal was to get comfortable with the idea of having sex with men, but if there's anything else--" and he might have to refer him away if he did. Somehow that thought is-- well, Ivan doesn't like it in the slightest.

He pillows his head against Ivan's chest. There's a lot he's gotten used to since coming to Beta Colony. Explicitly asking his LSP to help get him off because he feels like he can trust the man and simple making out had been a huge turn-on, is not one of those things. Being able to stay close to Ivan is enough.

"I'm not sure," he answers with a frown. "I suppose... I'd like to get used to being with men, generally. I'm not sure if I'll get to try on Komarr, but I'll be walking over a minefield without adding my obliviousness to the mix."

"It's not all that different from women, except for the sex. Perhaps more of its own unique minefields on planets with antiquated gender roles," Ivan offers in an attempt to be reassuring, fingers threading through David's hair. "There's always the assumption of machoism or inability to express emotions or talk frankly about a relationship, but none of those are unique to a relationship between men."

He's silent for a moment or two, and offers: "Why don't we set aside time near the end of every session for questions or whatever you want to do? You're making good progress as is-- but sometimes we don't account for everything."

The motion of Ivan's fingers has him closing his eyes and breathing out deeply in pure contentment. He really could fall asleep like this if there was actually time. The Komarran part of his brain is quick to point out how much money he'd be wasting if he did nod off during one of these sessions and it's enough to keep him more-or-less alert even while relaxing.

"I would like that." He thinks. "Though I'm unsure I'll always have something at the ready. I confess, I'm still getting a handle on what I should be doing in these sessions." And what he can even ask for.

"Anything to encourage your end goal," Ivan prompts, although he doesn't press him for any more details. "I left the plans open ended to allow for your own comfort, but I can restructure them for a more ridged plan if you'd like. I think we can cut out some of the lessons in the one I gave you at this point."

Like the ones about easing him into sexual contact, as he hadn't seemed to mind before. But he's not sure about that, in all honesty.

He shrugs lightly as he uncurls himself from Ivan and slides off to sit beside the man. As enjoyable as sitting in Ivan's lap was, he's starting to feel it makes for a rather silly image given David's age. That little bit of self-consciousness has kicked back in again and is always hard to kick.

"If you think it would help," he answers. "I came here because I was rather lost at the start of all of this."

"It might." Ivan doesn't complain when Duv slides off of him, although he misses the warmth and the weight of him as soon as he leaves. "And you can always tell me when you don't like the plan or reshuffle it around. Although--" He gives David a more searching look.

"And you may have to be more willing to visit our provided sex shop for a dildo eventually, since you'd rather use one of your own."

David's not going far, instead leaning against Ivan's side. It isn't until the mention of a dildo that he tenses and his face flushes red. That's a reality he knew was part of this, but one he certainly has no experience with. But he trusts Ivan, more than he realized as he feels less adverse to the idea than he expected he would.

"I can do that," he murmurs before clearing his throat and speaking more loudly. "Do you have any, ah, recommendations to start with?"

"Something small and soft," he says, as if judging dildo preferences was something he did every day. Well. "There's several shapes -- some fun novelty ones -- but you might want to go with something simple and non-realistic. No vibration unless you're interested on using it on yourself in the future."

It's heartening that David's at least more open to this now, even if he's tense and red. Ivan gives his shoulder a squeeze encouragingly. "You don't have to get it when you leave today."

David almost thinks he should be taking notes. Already that's more than he knew about dildos and he's thinking some of the objects he saw the one time he looked through the sex toy store may have actually been part of that rather large umbrella. Huh.

The squeeze is comforting and he nods as his face slowly returns to its usual shade. "I'll keep it in mind. Maybe after our next session." Once he's had time to try out his new earrings for the few errands he runs outside of his rented flat. "I'll stick with something simple."

"That's the way to start." Simple, and then build up to something more difficult. "It seems to work out well for you so far," Ivan continues, shifting in his seat before opening his arms for David to curl into him again. Don't worry, David, he hasn't forgotten what you wanted to do.

There's quiet gratitude in his expression at the wordless invitation. It's a lot simpler when he doesn't have to ask though he knows how important that is on Beta Colony in general. Another thing he needs to work on and if Ivan's going to leave the end of their sessions open ended for David to decide, that should help.

"It seems to be," he agrees, settling in against Ivan's side. "I, ah, really like this." The cuddling. In case that wasn't obvious.

He can't imagine what it's like, coming from a place where you don't ask. Don't things get tangled up before you can sit down and talk it out? What are actual interpersonal relationships like when that happens? It's something Ivan feels like he'll never know outside the bounds of his work, which is difficult enough when that happens.

"That's the idea, David," Ivan says with a grin, settling further into the couch. "I'm glad you do."

Part of him wishes he could have this in his personal life as well. Maybe changing his earrings up isn't a bad thing. If he ends up on a date with someone else, who knows. He might even enjoy it for once instead of rolling his eyes and being annoyed at his father's latest push for him to get bonded.

"It's hard not to fall asleep like this," he says a touch apologetically. The other man makes a very comfortable sleeping rest. "Do you have any advice if someone does approach me? To flirt that is."

"If you do, I won't hold it against you. Or charge extra." As for how to flirt, well. Ivan frowns, thinking. "Most people just ask me, but flirting is different. You want to make a good initial impression when you start, so your job is to be receptive. If they're offering something you don't want you should never feel pressured to take them up on it. Open body gestures, leaning towards them, smiling and laughing. Positive encouragement."

It's not really something he has to worry about. People find him if Ivan doesn't take the initiative himself; it all depends on how he's feeling.

He frowns slightly as he consider all of that. He can revisit the whole 'napping against his LSP' idea later.

"All right. Are people on Beta Colony willing to go slow?" he asks with some hesitation. Because that's something that could easily cause problems in his 'practicing.' He doesn't want to lead a Betan on and with how sexually open their culture is, he doesn't know how receptive they'd be to simply dating with no guarantee of anything else. Briefly he reaches up to touch his earrings and he wonders if he even got the right pair to get that across.

"If you found the right one. Everyone's needs and wants are different, and if you found someone you like who has a higher sex drive than you, you can always work out an open relationship with whatever terms and conditions you agree upon. Just be sure to say what you want and what you're looking for. The earrings help with that," he says, and nods gently towards them. Ivan can see why he'd be concerned, through the eyes of someone who's been a part of this for as long as he can remember.

Still, there's one thing he can't stress enough. "You need to communicate with whoever you're with. That part doesn't change with whatever you want your end goal to be."

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject